My love Is Like To Ice

My love is like to ice, and I to fire:
How comes it then that this her cold so great
Is not dissolved through my so hot desire,
But harder grows the more I her entreat?
Or how comes it that my exceeding heat
Is not allayed by her heart-frozen cold,
But that I burn much more in boiling sweat,
And feel my flames augmented manifold?
What more miraculous thing may be told,
That fire, which all things melts, should harden ice,
And ice, which is congeal's with senseless cold,
Should kindle fire by wonderful device?
Such is the power of love in gentle mind,
That it can alter all the course of kind.

Edmund Spenser

When We First Met

Dear Ms.

When we first met we did'nt touch.
That would come later, much later.
I though we had plenty of time.
And that I could wait for that moment.
But everything suprised me.
And its killing me inside.
Holding you would be like holding magic in my hands.
I never held your hand or felt its warmth
But I felt you presence and it has warmed me.
I have asked my father for one gift.
And from Heaven above he has promised it to me.
Promised that one day I will hold you hand and that you will hold mine.
That I will feel the warmth of your presence once again.
This is all that I crave at this moment.
You have capture ever moment of my life and held it captive from me.
Did you know that you own me? Or that even now that were apart I am yours.
I am your Fletcher without being able to curl at your feet to warm them.
When someone says it nice to see you again.
I think “I wonder how long it will be until I see her again?”
How long can I go on like this?
Too Long.

Cordell Rich

After

After I met you
My old dreams melted away
Into puddles of insignificance.

Cordell Rich
This is going to go badly!

Lets Pretend

Dear Ms.

Lets pretend that were in love.
And that Im not invisible.

Lets pretend that when your in bed with me
That your thinking of me.

Lets pretend that Im real.
And that Im breakable.

Lets pretend that Im the one.
And that Im not leaning on memories.

Lets pretend that you love me?
And that you care.

Mine on Top

Dear Ms. This could have been us.

I would have rested my cheek on your warm breasts,
Moist and glistening, cooled by your persperation
And listened for the beating of your heart.
I would have smelled the nectar of your body.
Feeling the rise and fall of your chest.
Lungs pulling in great swells of air.
Hearts pounding, muscles gready for fuel
One arm beneath you
One arm on top of you
Our feet entangled,
Playing the game.
Mine on top.
Yours on top.
Mine on top.
Yours on top.

Cordell Rich
It could still be us.

You Didnt Think So

Dear Ms.

Ive touched your hand,
Your hair,
Your cheek to my cheek.
Felt the warmth of
Your I love yous
In my ears,
Your mouth close to mine.
I've felt your chin
Resting on my shoulders
As you wisped in my ear.
Ive felt you finger
Slowly tracing a line
Across my shoulder
As you walked by.
You've lingered to long
And I have left to late
So that we could say
Nothing at all
I have turned to find you
Looking at me
And then smile
You have said those words to me
And heard them back again.
Yes,
I'm sorry,
But to me,
It was love.

Cordell Rich
Yes this was you, dont deny it! If you do your either a lier, or the worst kind of tease. I wish I knew

UPDATE Where have I been.

Thanks for the emails.

Ive been lost for now for months, lost in my own life. Or what there is of it. Ive lost a secret love.

Anyway it will seem as if I have just started to write again but thats not whats happening. Ive been writing all along, I have just not been posting it here. Ive written volumns that no one will ever see.

I have debated deleting this blog and moving on just as the woman did with the stone and as she did with me. I am still considering that, but for now, while I think, Im going to put some of my thoughts here.

Cordell Rich

My Advice

Take a Chance.
Reach out for her hand.
Draw it near you.
Skin to skin.

Cordell Rich
This is my advice to me now that its to late.
If Only I had taken it.
One day I will, if I get that chance again.

Here I am, Come and Get Me.

Sadly, I have been outed. This may come as a shock to many of you but I worked for the Federal government for many years and it was important that my true identity be obscured. I have had to live like this for the past 26 years. Recently my importance to the programs I worked on had declined and I became just another pawn in the political game that is our Government.

In a way its a relief. Since the war on drugs was bumped to our 2nd most favorite war, our funding and access as been seriously limited. So, in a misguided attempt to call attention to our budget woes the director "accidentally" identified me in a way that compromised my actual position, thereby making it no longer necessary to play the subterfuge game.

I could have worked to undo the damage and try to go back underground, but with so little time left in my career I decided instead to embrace the freedom it will give me. I'm sure the relief from the stress will be immediate.

There are only two last items left undone. I have to activate the agent who will be replacing me. So to do that I need to post a picture of myself on the internet. I chose this file picture of me when I was an active agent. The second is to post my secret code phrase in an open forum where it can be pick it up easily by the agent replacing me without the risk of detection to him so that he can access my files and pick up where I left off. That code phrase is: I've never seen Glenda Naked, but she showed me how to take her bra off without taking off her shirt when I was 14...wink wink.