Friday, August 29, 2008

The Snowflake and the Candle.



Dear Ms. Which are you?

Candles sizzle and pop
In an angry and desperate struggle.

Each snowflake fights and leans
To avoid the searing heat.

Until the two should collide
in one last desperate battle.

The candle anchored to its moorings
With only a wick to do its bidding.

The snowflakes path of freedom
form sea to sky to its chilly plunge.

The snowflakes gentle fall last lifted
By the hot and raising winds of fate.

One last hopeful tumble follows
Ten thousand feet of thoughtless dancing.

Then crackle or pop
As well as it may suite you.

And in that one instance along
fire turns to smoke or snowflake to water.

Without regard to all the history of the world
Only this one moment matters.

Cordell Rich

7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brilliant observation. Loved the word use.

10:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lovely! I like the words, The snowflakes gentle fall last lifted
By the hot and raising winds of fate.. keep writing! could you read and comment on my poems too? Thank you.

11:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an amazing observation and narrative to the importance of being in the now.

11:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Understandable choice of words. Only one shall go on. I love it

12:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Clearly, someone has broken your heart and you pour it out here. Does she know? Does she see? Has she been here?

9:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cordell,

You are welcome. I enjoyed Snowflake a lot.

The old style format was to capitalize the first letter of each line. A more modern style is capitalize exactly the way you would capitalize prose. That's what I usually do. Some people prefer not to capitalize anything.

A more complicated issue is grammar overall - including punctuation. I'm still working on that one. If you are composing an imagistic poem and want to suggest a veiled mood, clarity is not necessarily a high priority. Precise grammar and punctuation serve the interest of clarity which may be contrary to the poem's purpose. Where is the line drawn between imaginative language and bad construction and incompetency?

Diction is also complicated. In the interest of originality and color we want to juxtapose words in fresh arrangements that may stretch the meaning of some of the words. Even so, there is only so far you can go without torturing a word altogether.

I hope all this bull is a little bit useful.

For my own work, I like to try out everything and look for significance in unexpected contexts.

Robert

2:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I gave you a ten for your portrayal of the battle of the elements. Everything in nature is a struggle and yet everything survives with some sense of unity in the opposites.You have a very strong freeform writing style.

3:20 PM  

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